Hi, to whom ever is reading this.

I don't know what to do or who I can ask, but maybe one of the users has god some advice for me.
I use to date Rebel / Aimee about 10 months ago, she left one day and since then she has been avoiding me like the plague. I've been trying to talk to her all this time but she keeps on blocking all my attempts. She also won't tell me why she left or why she is doing what she is doing, she is however spreading all sorts of weird rumors about me and I don't actually know what to make of it all.

For a while I communicated with the woman takes bookings at the the club she works at just to find out how she is doing and that she must let me know if Aimee ever needs anything but she won't let me talk to Aimee, obviously because they are making money from her being there and they honestly could not care less if they are ruining someone's life.

I've know Aimee for a few years now, she can be a very stubborn person. I believe she left because of some assumption she made and when she found out she might have made a mistake, she was to proud and hard headed to admit it to herself, so she rather blames me for all the things that has been happening with her over the past 10 months.

Does anyone maybe know her, or know what I can do to get through to her. I don't care how you know her or what you can tell me. I'm just trying to make sense of what is going on, I must find some way to get closure, as it is it feels like I am failing her every day.

Maybe someone has a direct tel number for her or Facebook name or any way for me to get a message to her.
I will really appreciate any assistance or advice anyone can give me.

Thank you

Hard as it may seem, I would say it's time to move on

I think I've known this for a while now, and I should move on.
I just don't know if I will ever stop wondering what really happened and if that won't just keep on eating away at me. I never wanted to be one of those guys that goes to confront someone where they work, it always looks so damn common and it never seems to help at all anyway. But now I actually understand why someone would do that.

I don't believe anyone that is in a situation like this wants to have any further fights or wants to upset the other person. But the other person actually knows exactly wat they are doing and how they are constantly hurting someone. Then still refusing a 5 min conversation to let someone move on is like keeping that person's soul under arrest. Certain actions require an explanation, even if that explanation hurts. The alternative is potentially a life sentence and could leave a permanent scar on someone.

So for everyone out there that does not have the courage to face your decisions and who has been a coward up until now. Be aware that your inaction could be destroying someone. Everyone deserves to have some sort of closure, you can't expect people to just move on without any explanation or reason. To be honest, I've spoken to quite a few people over the past few months who has been left in similar situations. It seems to always be woman leaving men in situations like this, there has been a few exceptions,

It also seems that in most cases the woman did something because they were under the wrong impression and when they learn they made a mistake they refuse to admit and they blame and ignore. Then when the guys try to find out the woman start throwing around words like obsessed and stalker and they would even go as far as to get restraining orders.

Please if you are one of those people, man or woman, who is refusing to admit you made a mistake. Or if you are ignoring someone not because of something they did but for something you did. Then stop what you are doing and do the right thing and give that person 10min of your time, by doing that you might actually be giving them years that they could have been held down by those unanswered questions.

This will be different from person to person. But for those of us that don't like giving up, where giving up is almost never the answer. Those people probably put the most in their relationships, probably feels the most betrayed and probably least deserved to be treated this way.

Aimee, if you read this. Then know that you can tell me anything, it may hurt and I may be disappointed and angry at first, but those emptions go away quickly and I'll be fine to move on. But this what is currently happening is not getting easier, in fact it gets harder and it feels like I'm failing you every day. Please tell me anything, just let me go.
You know I was always the optimist and I always said that every day is the best day of my life... For almost a year now, I've been re-living the worst day of my life, the day where the person I care for most in the world is having sex for money and there is nothing I can do about it, and I have no idea why.

I'd like this day to end now please!

The strange thing is, is that even though I want to know what is going on more than anything. She has been telling the people around her all sorts of stories and when we did speak once just a few weeks after she left, she gave me some half bakes explanation and expected me to be fine with being lied to like that.

I'm more afraid that she will one day decide to actually give me the closure I want. But then instead of just telling me how it is, she will try and make it more profound or she will try and make it a better story. I'm scared that she will never admit to herself she made a mistake, by doing that she will always live with that "What If?" in her mind.
She will never know what we could have been and she will never be able to experience how I feel about her, she might never find unconditional love again or she might keep on believing that she is not worthy.

In a way I think she is just as scared as I am, because, if she contacts me and admit to have made a mistake... Then what has she been doing all this time and why did she do anything she did. Why did she then go through everything she did. She will in effect declare that she had sex with god knows how many people for no reason, and all the hurt she caused herself and me was all because of a lie or a misunderstanding.
Yes, I admit, that is one way a person could look at the situation. But sometimes the only way a person realizes that they made a mistake is by making it. To blame yourself or to blame others and to let that mistake ruin your life even more, will become the next mistake.
Eventually everyone has to face their demons and own up to their mistakes. It is always hard to make that first step, and to go into the unknown by making a different choice. Nobody ever says: "I wish I never tried doing the right thing" or "I wish I kept on living with those lies for a few years longer". The fact is, the only way how anyone moves on or truly get set free, is by facing whatever it is, dealing with the consequences, saying sorry if you have to or saying goodbye if you have to.

Either way, I'd like to remind Aimee that I'm still that same guy who she met 2 years ago, who she trusted with everything, who never gave up on her and who never abandoned her. I'd like to tell her that even though I've been hurt and confused and that even though we've both said some hurtful things. I'd like to remind her that we were always friends first, I was always fine just helping out as a friend. I never put any conditions to being there for you. I never wanted to stop being your friend just because we broke up. When we were still there at the first place we lived, when you trusted me and I trusted you. I thought we'd be friends forever.
Losing our friendship was inconceivable for us both. Somewhere along the line you lost your trust in me, you lost the faith you had in me. You started doubting my intensions and assumed only the worst possible things. None of that is because of things I did, or because I changed or because I betrayed you or ever lied to you. That all happened without me playing a role, I suspect you eventually left because of the same reasons you stopped trusting me and for the same reasons you started assuming all the bad stuff about me.
The only way you will ever know if your assumptions were warranted will be to confront me about whatever it is, I'll be honest about anything, just like I've always been with you. It does not matter what it is, I won't keep it against you, Ill just be grateful!

I do miss you every day. It does rip me apart every day because you are there doing what you are doing. I don't know why I check every now and then, but every time you get a new profile or new profile photos it devastates me just like it did when I saw your profile the first time. The nightmares of you getting hurt and being with all those people still wakes me up in tears every time I do eventually sleep.
But most of the time, I worry about you, I constantly wonder if you have everything you need, if you are in pain, if you can afford to go to doctors when you maybe get sick, if you are sad or hungry. Maybe you are reading something or maybe you are singing and dancing or crying.

Most of all I miss my best friend, the fun we had just going to Spar in the afternoons. Your laughter and thinking about you smiling is the only thing that makes me smile these days. Making you happy truly made me happy. You make me want to always give my best, I always want to make you proud of me. You can't imagine how proud I was when you were willing to give up people and things you cared about so much to stay out of that business and when you started making real plans, and when it seemed that there is nothing on earth that could keep you from reaching your goals.

When you stumbled along the way, you got back up and you carried on. You hardly ever asked for anything or needed my help, but I've been there and I always will be. Eventually your dreams also become my dreams. I'd like to think you haven't given up on those dreams, I haven't, I'd like to give those dreams one more try. I want my friend to be on the other side of the phone when I need her, I want you to feel comfortable to tell me what bothers you and what makes you sad or happy.
Again I don't top once I start thinking about you. I hope you see this one day, I hope you receive it the way I meant it, and I hope you can remember me for me, and I hope you can remember the bond and trust we shared once.

Yours Sincerely

Sorry guy. This 1 should remain in your past. Go live your life to the fullest. The key to happiness is being grateful for what we have and making the best of it. What's not meant for you will only hurt you until You let go.

Assetmanager...sadly words too true...xxx.. :((